I sat here staring at my computer screen for what seemed like hours, watching the cursor blink in reminder that I still have not typed anything yet. I close my eyes to feel deeper into the emotions and sensations that are present in hopes that I can find words to match the energy. Almost impossible, but always possible. This is the feeling that has strongly been present with me for 3 years now, always there, persistent and constant in its intensity. The words are hard to form and yet there is something there that wishes to be expressed.
Over the years I have watched tribes and communities grow and support one another and I have watched them split and fall apart. There is sadness in watching and feeling the division grow amongst a tribe that was once strong and supportive of one another. Witnessing the division, wanting to help in some way, but knowing that no one can be forced, no one can be pushed into doing something before they are ready, before they are open or before they feel safe enough to share what they need to share and not feel judged by what they need to express.
How does a community heal if it is unwilling to come together, to speak and express their disappointments, disagreements, their hurt or anger?
If trust has been broken, how can trust be regained if we stay silent and hold it all in?
How can understanding and compassion be available to us if we choose to close ourselves off to seeing the situation in another way?
Communities and tribes split, this I know, this isn’t a new concept, it is seen in nature and within humans all over the world since the beginning of time. It is the unwillingness to face the division and allow it to grow bigger and bigger that really challenges my understanding. Creating a tip toe like energy, or like walking on cracked glass where at any moment you may fall through type of energy that comes from both sides. And while both sides believe that they just want to move on and let the past be the past, they hold tightly to what they experienced or the hurtful words that was spoken to them, and in this holding on, the past can never be past. Healing cannot occur because the hurt and the anger is buried so deeply that resentment is born of it. As resentment grows so does the division amongst the people.
Tribes and communities can split and still come back together in times of need to support eachother. A split in a community does not have to mean the end of relationships you once had, it could just be an evolution of some sort, or a new way being.
Is it better to push those who were once close to our hearts out of our lives because of a misunderstanding or disagreement?
Or is it better to find a way back to one another and the love and support that existed in that relationship?
Time is speeding up, something is shifting and fast. The world as we know it in this moment will not be the same, it’s going to get dirty and difficult. Each of us are living on borrowed time, we each have an end, life is shorter than you expect. As a tribe or community, it is time to come together despite our differences, begin the journey of healing the wounds that pierced our hearts so that as a people united we are able to withstand what is coming.